So here is a little series ill be doing every few weeks or so, called Chart Reviews, which will focus on the top 50 songs on the Billboard charts of the week of the post. There will be one every few weeks or every month since, in 2018, the charts don’t really change so frequently and there’s also the fact that I hate, let me repeat myself here, I absolutely despise looking at the charts because of the mass majority of the songs being mediocre to god awful tracks that shouldn’t be where they are. A perfect example is at number one this week, and oh boy I can’t wait to break my keyboard typing that up.
No more delaying, run it…
At #50 we have Falling Down by Lil Peep & XXXtentacion… I’m so glad this track is falling off the charts. It’s not that I dislike the artists involved but it’s just a really bad track and if both artists were alive I would say the same thing, this track isn’t good and I can’t find one thing really noteworthy about it since, by the time I finish typing this, I would’ve already forgotten it. And I am a fan of X, I dislike Lil Peeps music, but I enjoyed X’s metal influenced tunes along with some of the more mainstream pop ones too, however, his album 17 was arguably one of the worst albums from that year and I don’t even remember half of those tracks names without looking?
Rating: Not worth your or my time
At #49 is Tequila by country duo Dan + Shay, who actually bring some decent songwriting to the table along with some authenticity. I actually enjoyed hearing this especially from this group of tracks. Well produced too.
Rating: Good, they do what Florida Georgia Line can’t
At #48 is Simple by the autotuned duo brainless, I mean Florida Georgia Line… Whoever thought that autotune and country should be a thing was an idiot. I mean seriously, I don’t know how cruise went fucking diamond of all things but come on, why these guys.Rating: Poor
At #47 is Beautiful by Bazzi featuring Camila Cabello, a decent track, it’s underwhelming, and Camila doesn’t have the ability to carry a track yet.
At #46 Wake Up In The Sky by Gucci Mane, Bruno Mars, and Kodak Black. The three carry the song and its a very well made track vocally, the instrumental isn’t anything special, impressive and is rather bland. Bruno is great on this track.
At #45 is The Middle by Zedd, Maren Morris, and Grey. This song has dominated the charts this year and honestly, I don’t mind it. When it comes to these EDM songs, many that hit the mainstream aren’t really anything special, however, Maren Morris ditched the country roots and this combo is actually decent. And unlike most of these songs on the charts, this is a memorable track, the catchiness definitely helps that and the longevity because this song has been on the charts for 37 weeks and I think it’ll stay on here for another month before dropping out of the top 50. It’s decent, it follows the same formula as most EDM, and its got a bit of uniqueness to it.
Rating: Eh, why not
At #44 No Tears Left To Cry by Ariana Grande. Not one of my personal favorites from her but It’s not bad.
Rating: Okay track
At #43 It’s… disappointment. Did Eminem forget how to write a chorus? Venom contains one of the worst choruses from him and of this year. It’s so bad, He’s at least not as terrible with the rest of the track, a big step forward in the right direction, especially after “White-Guilt the album” or as everyone knows as Rebirth. Come on Em, Marshall Mathers 2 was pretty good, stop throwing quality out the window.
Rating: This is rough, to say the least
At #42 is I’m A Mess by another one of today’s unauthentic artist, Bebe Rexha… It’s not that good. If you were investing in any female artists, don’t choose Bebe, Choose Camilla Cabello instead, there’s definitely a better upsell with her. It’s unmemorable, and so is the artist.
Rating: mediocre, run of the mill pop track with no authenticity
At #41 is Always Remember Us This Way by Lady Gaga. While I enjoy a chunk of her charting songs right now, this is the messiest in my opinion. The quality on the drums is noticeably lackluster.
The most formulaic track on the charts right now is at #40 and its I Like Me Better by Lauv. Its so simple that I could’ve made this track, and it’s so formulaic that anyone could’ve, and I know five songs off the top of my head that I can name that do this exact same song structure and are in the same genre. AND they did it better, so fuck this track.
Rating: Piss Poor
Broken by Lovely the Band at #39 and this can’t be the breakthrough indie/alternative rock track that gets the title of the biggest hit of their genre of the year. It just can’t be. Someone, please come through with a Bop that’s actually good, last year we had Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man which was a good song. There has to be something better than this. It’s not bad but, its just not something too memorable.
Rating: Pretty Decent
Psycho by Post Malone is at #38 and this was one of my least favorite tracks that Post had put on Beerbongs & Bentleys. There’s better material off of that album, why is this the song that’s big, put Rich & Sad up on the charts instead.
Sad by controversial Rapper XXXtentacion is at 39 and I think this track is a good song, it definitely doesn’t last long at all but, I think X put some passion in on this track and while I would prefer Iloveitwhentheyrun on the charts, I’m glad to see this here.
I’ll Never Love Again takes the spot at 38 and I love Gaga’s vocals here. Excellent delivery.
Now look, PATD used to be good in my opinion but, now it’s just Brandon Urie and Friends. High Hopes at 37 is just meh. I guess it’s nice to see this track as it’s not the most awful track.
Rating: Won’t be remembered in the future
Meant to be at 36 by cancer, made by actual fucking ear cancer is also known as fake country artists featuring a fake pop singer. This track shows that god awful autotune more than ever and every time I hear it I hate it even more. It’s like how the screamo bands tried it back in 2007. Bebe shows the world how much of an industry plant she is along with how she has no personality. It’s like these pop singers are trying country out as a backup plan when they fail.
Rating: This is why I drink
One of pops flop artists of last year is surviving the fall of pop music, Taylor Swift with Delicate at 35 and, it’s one of her worst tracks from that album. there is nothing worth remembering about this actual industry plant and this song in particular which has a not so decent beat, along with some terrible songwriting.
No brainer is the attempt at making last years I’m The One again but a failure at best. It’s not even mediocre, it’s just a rinse repeat. Same song structure, and if I here DJ KHALED at the beginning of a song one more time I might go play in traffic.
Taki Taki By Dj Snake featuring Selena Gomez, Cardi B, and Ozuna is a reggaeton-EDM bop that actually is pretty good on a first listen, but has low staying power. Cardi and Ozuna are great on this track while Selena is underwhelming. Overall I still enjoy it.
At number 30 is Boo’d Up by the breakthrough artist Ella Mai and I’ve listened to this song since released and it is so nice to here someone who can actually sing making it in the music industry.
Lil Wayne is back with a Good album this year and this is one of the better tracks on the album that’s a solid banger. Glad to see Wayne with a good comeback. Let’s hope he stays around and gives us quality. The beat is grand and well produced.
At 28 is Close Friends by Young Thug who… I mean Lil Baby… Get some personality and get something to make you different from every other Young Thug wannabe.
Rating: Mediocre at best
I wanna like Big Bank by Yg featuring 2 Chainz, Nicki Minaj, and Big Sean but the beat just doesn’t slap. Big Sean flops on the track, Nicki is underwhelming, and 2 Chains and YG can’t carry this track.
I… HATE Drake… but he isn’t even the problem here, Lil Baby just gives people who take shots at mumble rap ammo. And the beat is just mediocre. Not to mention that its only 2 Minutes long. It’s just mediocre at best.
Rating: Mediocre at best
STOOPID by 6ix9ine is at 25 and I like 6ix9ine’s delivery over this beat, I think it’s in your face and the phoned-in feature from Bobby Shmurda is an interesting inclusion on the track, especially with how it is implemented.
I GOT HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOE’S aka Mo Bamba by Sheck Wes, which I predict will be his only hit and will fade out and be included with the rest of the forgettable rappers around today. This song is an earworm that’s mediocre, It’s not memorable.
Lil Wayne and Kendrick Lamar at 23 and This is a good track, the two work together well here and the Kendrick feature really pulls through on the track.
God Is A woman by Ariana Grande is at 22 and this is one of my favorite songs from the pop singer. Her vocals are great, decent songwriting, good instrumentals. Not bad.
Selena Gomez is at 21 with her song Back To You and its a run of the mill pop song. I’m running out of things to say for these mediocre tracks, there’s nothing special about some of these worth noting.
Benny Blanco, Halsey, and Khalid with Eastside are at 20 and its okay. There is nothing special here either. This is really forgettable though, this will be long forgotten.
Okay, I might dislike Drake but nonstop is actually pretty good. I like the beat and Drake actually pulls through on this track, delivering some tolerable bars and decent flow.
Rating: Decently Good
You know, I thought Halsey would die off, especially with the rap takeover that’s happening right now. I kind of have indifferent feelings on her previous material, and I don’t see why this track is getting this attention. There are way better songs out there right now that do this but better. It’s not bad, it’s okay, but I don’t think she will be remembered in the future unless she steps it up.
Moving up to 17 is I Love It by Kanye West and Lil Pump. I’m a fan of what Lil Pump has made, and what Kanye has put out not only this year but throughout his entire career, However, this is Lil Pumps worst feature and Kanye somewhat saves this track. It’s great with the music video but, without it, the song is mediocre at best.
Trip isn’t a bad song but it isn’t as good as Boo’d Up. I still want to see more from Ella Mai even though her album didn’t live up to the hype I had for it.
Rating: Decently good
Gunna and Lil Baby are awful on Never Recover and Drake isn’t even the problem… AGAIN. Why people, why give these sloppy artist artists attention when people like Ski Mask the Slump God or literally anyone with actual talent in songwriting in rap exist.
You know what, I enjoy this track. While Tyga sounds corny as hell and Offset is okay, the two work together well here and it’s a pretty fun song.
Imagine Dragons is at 13 with Natural and this is a pretty messy track in my opinion. It’s not even catchy like Thunder was, and it doesn’t deserve this spot on the charts at all. Fake rock at its finest.
Kehlani has a good voice along with Khalid but this track just doesn’t do it for me. There’s nothing special about, it’s just another R&B track on the charts that blends in with the rest.
This is why I hate Drake and this song for that matter. It’s on the charts because of some stupid dance craze thing that’s basically the only thing keeping it on here. I only like the ending and the rest sounds so fake that it makes me contemplate even wanting to write about music. This is worst than God’s Plan, at least with that song I can somewhat enjoy the beat, here I can’t because every time I hear this I think about all the people that do this stupid dance. This is the equivalent of the Sheck Wes song on the charts currently but, worst.
Rating: Mediocre at best
This is trash, Fefe at number 10. The flow is the worst thing. The beat is run of the mill and Nicki… why? It’s weird because I like some of 6ix9ines material, but this is abysmal. Nothing either artists does on this song is good and I don’t see why people listen to what sounds like a record player skipping ever second.
I Like It by Cardi B is a nice reggaeton beat, however, it isn’t that good, and it’s a little messy. Cardi B might just be the female Drake? We’ll have to see when there’s more material from her.
Did Bastille really have to collab with Marshmello to get to the top 10? I don’t care for Marshmello but this isn’t too bad. It’s a little more colorful which makes it stand out from all of these songs.
Rating: Mediocre to okay
I gave this song a chance at stopped at exactly 45 seconds since it sounded like they just took songs from other musicians and made it their own… the beginning sounds like blessed with a curse from now rock outfit Bring Me The Horizon and the first words the singer says after it cuts to the more upbeat portion sounds like he’s trying to sing In My Feelings by Drake. Wait, is Drake the root of all the problems on this list?
Edit: I listened to most of the track and its repetitive thievery that sounds somewhat better than an act like Imagine Dragons. So better than bad.
Sicko Mode is great and both artists come together here well to make a solid rap track, and Travis Scotts album was good too, I thoroughly enjoy the production on both the album and the song.
Shallow is actually the worst of these tracks, I dislike the combination of vocals here. It’s not put together well in my opinion. Rating: Poor
This is the worst rap song on the charts, and why is it at #4? Did people forget that there is actually good rap songs by artists that aren’t trying to be other rappers and steal their style? I’d be happy if these guys disappeared from music completely, in fact, I’d argue that no one would notice.
Better Now is at #3 this week and it’s one of the good tracks off of his last album. I’m glad to see this in the top 3 and not Lil Baby and Gunna.
Lucid Dreams by Juice WRLD… not bad, definitely one of the best off of his album, but while I enjoy the song, Juice has to get some more material that’s quality out there since his last album was below mediocre and filled with really bad autotuned emo-trap songs. We’ll see where he goes since this is one of the biggest artists and songs of the year. I have hope for Juice WRLD and will keep my eye on him.
Now, this is completely fake, and easily an industry plant. Girls Like You by Maroon 5… There is nothing real or even creative here. This is clearly a sellout track that lacks instrumentally and even lacks in songwriting. We just had Nice For What by Drake and that was good at what these guys are trying to do. I am actually promoting Drake here and that is saying something. What makes this song #1 worthy? It’s not Adam Levine and his currently untalented artistry, or his voice, or anything from him. And I don’t even think it has anything to do with Cardi B being on this track. I mean she isn’t bad here but she definitely doesn’t carry this track to the top spot on the charts. Nothing about the song carries this to the top of the charts. But you know what does? A music video with multiple women just dancing? Some of the do others don’t and even Ellen doesn’t look like she wants to be there. Actually, this just hit me, how do you dance to this? This is as slow as a prom song… oh god, I can already hear it playing at every High School.
Rating: Bad, really bad
And my pain and suffering is now done, I will do more in the future in either text or video, more material on the way along with some quick reviews.